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Source link: http://archive.mises.org/10714/enemies-of-civilization/

Enemies of Civilization

September 25, 2009 by

First they destroy our toilets. Now they are targeting toilet paper.

{ 16 comments }

Mushindo September 25, 2009 at 10:27 am

ROFL.

This reminds me – absurd levels of regulation around toilet paper are rife in my country —–

check out this article as a sample of just how absurd:

http://retail.bizcommunity.com/Article/196/307/36916.html

Save My Ass September 25, 2009 at 11:03 am

Wipe your ass with your bare hands and SAVE THE PLANET, LOL !!!! HA HA HA HA !

If that’s how they want to “save the planet” then I’d rather save my ass.

I’m sorry Mises but you knew that talking about toilet stuff would attract profanity, LOL !

The Rackman September 25, 2009 at 11:07 am

When the day comes that they take away my toilet paper is the day I fight (and kick them right in their a..)!

Put On Your Shit Kickers And Kick Some Shit September 25, 2009 at 12:34 pm

THE PLANET IS IN DANGER…
GLOBAL WARMING THREATENS US ALL…

THAT’S WHY, ME, AL GORE, IS ABOUT TO REVEAL TO YOU AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH.

WE MUST NOW ON WIPE OUR ASSES WITH OUR BARE HANDS.

THAT’S THE ONLY WAY WE WILL SAVE THE PLANET.

AND WE MUST SAVE WATER TOO, SO WE CAN’T JUST WASH THE SHIT OFF OUR HANDS WITH WATER.

SO AFTER YOU HAVE WIPED YOUR ASSES WITH YOUR BARE HANDS AND SOAKED THEM ALL UP WITH FRESH SHIT.

YOU MUST LICK THE SHIT OFF YOUR HANDS !

Al Gore September 25, 2009 at 12:36 pm

The manbearpig is coming,
The manbearpig is coming…

Hurry, wipe your asses with your bare hands in order to save the planet, you must do so now or we’re all doomed !!!

Jorge Borlandelli September 25, 2009 at 12:42 pm

Do please continue to use the soft paper. Uruguayan firms plant trees that grow in eight years and exports the pulp to make the paper.
Thanks for your intelligent and civil comments, but I will not shake hands with you.

Micah September 25, 2009 at 2:22 pm

I bow to you, Mr. Borlandelli. Good day.

FTG September 25, 2009 at 3:24 pm

What’s incredible is some of the comments from people that justify this idiocy with the non sequitur “it is good for the Planet”, or that “Our [our???] trees are precious.”

Mike September 25, 2009 at 4:06 pm

I wouldn’t call it incredible. Sad or disheartening, perhaps. What’s really a shame is that it cannot possibly be an honest, deeply held conviction.

As a somewhat recent inmate of the government indoctrination camps, I can say with confidence that state schools have so completely filled their minds with BS that they have been rendered completely incapable of distinguishing reality from fantasy. What we have going on in this country is mass neurosis, courtesy of the state. Most of these people will never have a true, honest conviction in their lives. It would take a whole lot of Freuds to teach these people to recognize reality enough to change that.

HL September 25, 2009 at 11:43 pm

My brand new office building has Soviet style toilet paper; toilets that need to be flushed three times to send #2 away; stingy faucets that send narrow streams of water at high velocity into your hands, spraying water droplets all over your suit and such; automatic lights that turn off before you are even done with #2; etc.

Then, I get home tonight after passing a dozen traffic cops hungry to issue revenue citations, only to find my electric bill with new charges to pay for solar panels in the wild – and a glossy insert encouraging me to keep the thermostat at 69 in winter and 80 in summer. Why not just move into a tent in my backyard and burn my feces for warmth in the winter??

It reminds me a bit of HL Mencken’s little quip on Protestants being the folks who are forever terrified that someone, somewhere, is having a good time. Updated to today, that’d be someone, somewhere, having a nice relaxing #2 moment, under natural, full-spectrum lighting, with a big toilet that flushes the processed remains of yesterday away in a jiffy, followed by softy tissue that once distinguished America from all other heathen lands, and then, a nice long handwashing under faucets that actually stream generous quantities of water at low velocity, allowing you to work that soap into a rich lather.

Oh, and electricity would cost about 95% less today, on average, if it was provided by willing purveyors and purchased by willing buyers, instead of this hybrid corporofascist regime we have now. But heck if my thermostat ain’t right now set at a humane 70, my airconditioner is blowin’ happiness this very minute. Ahhhh.

Brian Macker September 26, 2009 at 8:36 am

They kept claiming that old growth trees are required for plush toilet paper but that is not the case. It just requires fresh cut trees, not recycled. Even young trees have long fibers.

Nizarras September 26, 2009 at 9:57 am

HL,

“toilets that need to be flushed three times to send #2 away;”

Look at it the bright way, if your toilets would have a bigger water tank and a bigger water flow, imagine the mess on the floor if #2 would get clogged inside the toilet !!!

Now, with low flow toilets, at least if it gets clogged, you don’t mess up the floor and you have a fighting chance to get #2 through without having to wipe the floors clean.

MariusAureus September 26, 2009 at 1:08 pm

I wonder… If we breathe, we produce much carbon dioxide.

Maybe we should stop breathing?

:-/

mpolzkill September 26, 2009 at 1:35 pm

MariusAureus,

Without a doubt, that is the general idea of many of these people.

gaia September 26, 2009 at 11:26 pm

to al gore:
thanks for the novel tip. should i trim my fingernails before i save the planet?

wiped out September 27, 2009 at 10:31 pm

From the article:
The reason, they say, is that plush U.S. toilet paper is usually made by chopping down and grinding up trees that were decades or even a century old. They want Americans, like Europeans, to wipe with tissue made from recycled paper goods.

Okay, so what happens when we run out of recycled paper goods? Do you have to recycle the toilet paper???

Soviet Toilet Czar: Due to the scarcity of sustainable paper products, consumers are asked to render their used toilet tissues to the nearest paper recycling facility. Failure to comply may result in a shortage of personal paper products and will be punished with a $100,000 fine.

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